


An Admittedly Welcome Annoyance

by Hypatikar



Series: The Adventures of Using Scholarly Curiosity and Love to Commit Dastardly Acts [1]
Category: Elder Scrolls, Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: Awkward Dates, Awkward Flirting, Awkwardness, Cute Ending, F/M, Light-Hearted, Light-hearted humor, Socially Awkward Neloth, Wholesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-10-13
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:47:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 7,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26992381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hypatikar/pseuds/Hypatikar
Summary: She was so very annoying! But also useful. And clever, and brave, and persistent. Talvas was always so dull, and the Dragonborn was anything but.Imported from FFnet.
Relationships: Female Dovahkiin | Dragonborn/Neloth
Series: The Adventures of Using Scholarly Curiosity and Love to Commit Dastardly Acts [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2052219
Comments: 2
Kudos: 31





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Imported from my ffnet account, here is the link if you'd rather read on there:
> 
> https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13604396/1/An-Admittedly-Welcome-Annoyance :)

It was a day like any other on Solstheim when the annoying Dragonborn had waltzed up to him at the Earth Stone. Neloth had been annoyed, then surprised, then interested, in that order, when the Bosmer had begun talking. Stories of the acclaimed, prophetic hero had reached his ears, of course, but _everyone_ had been expecting a big brute of a Nord, not a spritely little wood elf. And by Malacath's hairy toenails, she could _talk_! Of course, who wouldn't want to learn from a Master Wizard of the House Telvanni?

Much to his infinite torment (the Three must certainly be jealous of his magical prowess), she arrived in Tel Mithryn not one week later, asking him what he knew about the Black Books. So, he led her to Nchardak, and she frolicked all the way to the desolate ruin, along with her surly Dunmer companion. Todlryn? Telwyn? He couldn't remember his name, he had no use for remembering the names of mercenaries. He couldn't even remember _her_ name... so he addressed her as Dragonborn unfailingly. Or hero, when he was feeling particularly condescending.

Even Neloth, as skilled as he was, had to admit she was quite good with the little bow she conjured. Talvas could learn a thing or two from her conjuration magicks, not that the witless wonder would actually learn anything from it.

Finally, when the divinities were feeling more merciful, he was able to get back to his work at Tel Mithryn. Fetching distractions! The Dunmer sipped at his piping hot canis root tea, idly flipping the pages of the arcane tome the Dragonborn had sold him. Its title was 'The Dreamstride', and he pondered after how she acquired it. Its contents were filled with the esoteric machinations of the Daedric Prince of mental anguish and night terrors, Vaermina, and Neloth was feeling particularly smug about it being in his possession now. How jealous his fellow House members back in Morrowind would be at the sight of such a rare find!


	2. Chapter 2

After that nasty business with Miraak, which had been concluded only two days ago, Illien felt like visiting her friend, Neloth. She doubted he would use the same word in reference to _her_ , but she actually liked the Dunmer wizard. It was obvious he was talented and possessed great knowledge of the arcane. Sure, he was insensitive and careless, but she found him sort of adorable.

With Teldryn behind her, cursing at her cheating to get ahead of him with the Whirlwind shout, the two made their way to Tel Mithryn. She had cleared the Ash Spawn from the southwestern part of the island, and it was her hope they would be few here, too. Unfortunately, she and her sarcastic mercenary ran into no less than a dozen making their way to the fungi abode.

"By the Three, I'm so fetching tired of this damned island. Anytime.." Teldryn stopped then added for emphasis, "best time would be soon - you want to go back to Skyrim, sign me up. I've seen enough of Solstheim to last a lifetime."

For a mercenary she was paying well, he complained _a_ _lot_. Illien enjoyed Teldryn, she had made fast friends with him, finding his surliness amiable and admittedly adorable. He possessed a good, if not deadpan, sense of humor, and he was good with the conjuration school. Anytime she came across a chest full of gems, she split it between them, giving him the larger half, because surely, he was in more need of it.

A smile lit her face when she came upon the large fungi rooftops of Tel Mithryn, and she shouted to get ahead of Teldryn again. He was behind her, panting, and with a streak of compassion, she waited for him to catch up. That apprentice she hadn't caught the name of was practicing outside, a conjuration spell in his right hand. Briefly, she wondered if she should correct his stance and method, since he seemed to be struggling, but he was stubbornly focusing on a point in the scenery she hadn't yet caught.

Deciding to ignore him, she practically skipped up the roots of the largest fungi and opened the door to the magical abode. The smell of magic was strong here, and its scent was more powerful than anything she had sensed at the College back in Skyrim. Her body felt light and ethereal as she embraced the azure stream that allowed goers to float up and down out of the main tower. Her limbs felt a little like jelly when her feet were finally on solid ground.

"If you're going to be up here, stay out of my way, Varona." The irritated voice of Neloth sounded from across the room. "Oh, it's you again."

Suddenly, Neloth walked over to her, abruptly abandoning whatever he was working on. He inspected her with an inquisitive eye, the eye of a clinical scholar. Gone was the perpetual annoyance, now replaced with scholarly fascination. It would come as no surprise if he was the first to learn of Miraak's defeat. Great witches and wizards were, after all, greatly attuned to the magisphere of their surroundings.

"Hold still! Let me get a good look at you.." The Dunmer said, his ashen hand taking hold of her chin and moving it side to side as he searched her eyes.

"What are you looking for, Neloth?" She asked confusedly.

"Incipient madness. Loss of self-awareness. Black spots in the whites of the eyes." He sighed and began to explain, "Any of the documented indications of Hermaeus Mora's permanent influence." Just as quickly, he dropped her chin and pulled back quickly as if touching an insect, "No. You look fine. Well, at least no different from when I last saw you."

How sweet of Neloth! Illien hadn't known he had it in him to be caring, or at least, to pretend to be caring. What a sweet elf he had the potential to be, if he wasn't so blatantly selfish and lacking in social awareness.

"Oh, well, you don't need to worry about me, Neloth!" She said, beaming up at him.

He hurriedly spoke, "I wasn't worried. Just interested. It isn't often I get to observe first-hand many people who've spoken to Hermaeus Mora!" Illien could've sworn the tips of his gray ears had momentarily turned purple, if one looked at him in the right light.

"Don't you want to know what happened with Miraak?" She asked, the stupid smile still stubbornly plastered on her face. Okay, maybe she was a little high from her victory over the ancient dragon priest.. but it isn't everyday that she had a chance to be victorious against a 6,000 year old dragonborn!

"Who? Oh, him.." Could he really be this unfocused? "Well, I assume you killed him. Or Hermaeus Mora turned on him when you looked like the winning bet. Or, a bit of both. Miraak's influence has vanished from Solstheim. So I assumed you had handled things. Why, did something interesting happen?" He sounded a bit suspicious, but not towards her. It was the kind of suspicion any scholar got when they suspected they hadn't heard the full story.

"Hmm... not really.. unless you consider delving into four Black Books and gaining immense esoteric knowledge and defeating a six thousand year-old dragonborn and saving Solstheim interesting..." She trailed off in a teasing manner.

Neloth huffed and crossed his arms, looking half the part of a stuck up princess, if only he wasn't bald and a male. "Well, that is what you hero types do, isn't it? I wasn't expecting anything less."

"Mind if I use your enchanting table?" She asked, off-topic.

"Ugh.. I suppose not. Go ahead, just stay out of my way."

He was so cute!


	3. Chapter 3

Illien kept quite close to Tel Mithryn over the next few days, helping Talvas out with his conjuration spells and trying her damnest not to get him in trouble with his master. Teldryn was dying of boredom, but Illien could make fun out of anything she encountered, so they were going to stick around. All of her affairs in Skyrim were finished, so she had no obligation to be anywhere, really. Maybe this is the Dragonborn's retirement.

A roar which was not entirely horrific met her ears and she looked to Teldryn in surprise. What was that? It seemed to come from near the ocean a bit away from Tel Mithryn. Curious, she wandered over to the source, conjuring her spectral bow for good measure. It was some kind of.. floating creature. A hooded Dunmer was sitting on a rock not too far from it, and cautiously, she approached him. She looked between the massive, oddly serene creature and the elf, her open mouth suddenly catching flies.

"From the look on your face, I'm guessing you've never seen a Silt Strider before?" Came the Dunmer's amused voice.

"You're right, I haven't. What exactly is it?" She asked, not bothering to hide the wonder in her voice.

"This is Dusty. I personally trained her from a larva. Feels like a lifetime ago.." The elf said, a nostalgic edge now in his tone. "She hasn't been in traveling condition for quite a while now. I've tried to let her go off on her own but she insists on staying here!"

"How are you two surviving out here?"

"We get by trading odds and ends with the locals. I've decided to stay here and make sure she passes in peace. It's the least I can do for her." He answered. Illien felt her heart beaming with compassion for the elf and his Silt Strider now. How generous of him to do that for his companion. The Bosmer showed similar compassion for the flora and fauna living in Valenwood, too.

"Can I pet her?" She asked, already excitedly moving forward to the gentle giant.

"Sure, Dusty's always had a rather gentle disposition. Be careful with her though, she's a bit worse for wear."

And so Illien stayed around the elf named Revus for a few days, since she couldn't sleep near Tel Mithryn without looking like a stalker. She was getting bored, damn it! There was no longer a world to save, no longer a primordial terror to vanquish from the world.. maybe she could finally retire and become an ash yam farmer in Solstheim. Illien snorted, _as if you have the patience for that_. Neloth was a researcher though, maybe he needed help!

The proverbial light went off in her head at the thought, and she hurriedly excused herself from Dusty and Revus to make her way back to the massive fungal kingdom. Teldryn followed her dutifully, and she nearly considered letting him off the hook and telling him to go back to Raven Rock. But what would be the fun in that?

Neloth was looking as severe as ever as he worked on some.. concoction. Illien had never been particularly interested in alchemy, that was for the meticulous and patient. She was neither of those things. The Dunmer looked up from his alchemy table, obviously expecting someone else.

"Where is Varona? Have you seen her? I'm hungry!" He exclaimed.

"No, Neloth. I haven't seen Varona." She answered.

"Well, find her! And tell her I want apple cabbage stew with some canis root tea."

"Of course, Master Neloth! As you command." She replied, bowing as low as she could jokingly. She doubted he would even notice she was joking, however. He was brilliant, but far too self-absorbed.

"Finally. Someone around here who appreciates my importance."

Varona wasn't that hard to find, her body was surrounded by ash spawn which immediately turned their sights to she and Teldryn. She wondered how Neloth would react when she told him the news, or if he'd even care. Most brilliant minds like his were impervious to mortal weaknesses such as grief, so she doubted - not that this made him a bad elf, though.

Illien made her way back to Neloth, the dread of having found someone dead not doing anything to dampen her mood. Neloth's arms were crossed and he was currently lecturing Talvas on something she couldn't bother to eavesdrop on. The lecture was abandoned when he noticed her arrival.

"Have you found Varona yet? I could really use some tea." He said indignantly.

"Varona is dead. Attacked by ash spawn not too far from here."

"Dead? Well, that's annoying. There are more and more of those ash spawn around here lately." He huffed, his perpetual annoyance showing no sign of going away in the near future, ever. "I suppose you're going to have to find me a new steward. Try Raven Rock. They are in awe of me there. I'm sure almost anyone would be willing to serve me."

"What kind of person should I look for?" She asked.

The Dunmer lifted his nose and waved his hand dismissively, "Once word gets out, there will be a lot of people to choose from. Someone with a brilliant mind and robust physique who is blindly obedient would be ideal. Oh, and they need to know how to brew tea. Ulves always waters it down."

"Of course, Master Neloth, he who is both man and divine. I shall find you a new steward!"


	4. Chapter 4

Illien hoped it wouldn't be too hard to find a new steward for Neloth, but no one wanted to work for the poor wizard! She'd volunteer if she didn't have at least _some_ pride! Really, it would be so different from the monotonous life in Raven Rock these people lived, as Neloth was always coming up with new, fascinating theories to explore. Was she truly the only one who saw any kind of redeemable qualities in him? Sure, he was careless, blunt, and rude, but underneath, she could tell he was a softie..

"How would you like to be the new steward of Tel Mithryn? A steward under the brilliant and charming Master Wizard, Neloth?" She asked the local blacksmith, Glover Mallory.

"Ha! _Work for Neloth_! Ha ha ha ha!" Was the blacksmith's reply. She frowned a bit but didn't let the smith's answer dull her still lingering victory high.

Surely, she could find someone! Maybe Geldis would know, or maybe Geldis would want to? It wasn't like he was drowning in patronage.. Said Dunmer was currently mopping the consistently empty bar, his eyes beaming at the sight of a customer.

"Well, well.. was startin' to think you had become too high and mighty to give the ol' 'Netch a visit. What brings you back around here, sera?"

Maybe it would be best to butter him up first. She placed a couple septims on the counter and ordered a sujamma, taking a seat on the barstool across from Geldis. He was nice enough, in stark contrast to the misery of Raven Rock.

" _Weeeeelll_.. Geldis, I have a _very_ tantalizing proposition for you!" She announced, and as sure as spriggans were glowed green, a twinkle of interest found its way into his ruby eyes.

"I'm listenin', sera." Came his reply.

"There's an opening for a new steward at Tel Mithryn, _very_ prestigious position, you know. Imagine, working under the erudite and scholarly Master Neloth - he who commands storm and spriggan! You could learn _so much_ from him, and the only thing you would need to do? Serve him tea and food, and all of the knowledge he possesses will be at your disposal." Perhaps that sounded _a tad_ dramatic, but everything she said was true! Though, she doubted Neloth cared for his servants enough to teach them anything he knew.

For the whole of her speech, the rubies of Geldis' eyes only grew larger and it looked as though he wanted to laugh but was too polite or too desperate for patronage. Finally, he couldn't contain it anymore, and clapped her on the shoulder with a gray hand and snorted, his snort gradually turning into laughter and then to heaving for breaths. Damn ash.

"Work for Neloth? And leave the 'Netch behind? Who would look after this place? Besides, Neloth is crazy. I've heard he talks to mudcrabs." He finished with a laugh, Teldryn joining in behind her. Traitor!

"That's not true!" She defended.

Hmm.. what about the cook here at the Retching Netch? Every time she'd passed him, he'd seemed pretty desperate for coin or other. Her sujamma firmly in her hand, she marched up the stairs, Teldryn still laughing behind her. One more snarky comment from him, and she swore she'd pay _him_ to work for the Telvanni wizard.

"Hey, Drovas." She greeted.

The Dunmer looked up from the stew he was currently preparing and she noticed he startled when she called his name.

"Oh, it's you, outlander. What might you need, hm?"

"I have a delectable offer for you, Drovas. There's an opening for a new steward in Tel Mithryn. While there, you'll be serving tea and managing the affairs of the fungal abode for Master Neloth, commander of magicks of all schools. You will have a bed, food, and coin, not to mention all the magical knowledge you could ever dream of. What say you, my elven brother?"

"What, leave this place behind and work for an old, crazed Telvanni wizard?" She almost thought he was going to say no, then he continued. "Let me just get my things - wait! On second thought, I can get new things! I'm off!"

A smile of victory lit her face finally. Neloth would be so pleased, and maybe she could befriend him now that she'd ensured the future of Tel Mithryn's affairs! She would go straight over there on the morrow to check up on him.


	5. Chapter 5

Ugh. How hard was it for Neloth's servants to brew him an acceptable pot of tea? It wasn't chronomancy or high arithmetic! Neloth winced as he sipped from his _lukewarm_ cup of canis root tea. Disgusting! At least it was strong though, and not watered down like Ulves always brewed it. His cooking was fine though, perhaps Neloth could replace Ulves with him. Less stressful that way, and it would remove yet another source of annoyance! That Drovas man would always be in the kitchens and would never have the opportunity to come up here, and Ulves would be gone!

Smugly, the Dunmer smiled at the _marvelous_ idea, until he heard someone floating up to his tower. How he hoped it wasn't Talvas again, sporting freshly burnt robes for the third time this week. It wasn't Talvas, though, it was the hero.

"Neloth!" She beamed. He crossed his arms, unimpressed with her need to say his name, which they both already knew. _Idiot_. _Annoying_ _idiot_. But better company than Talvas, he supposed. "I've found you a new steward."

"That Drovas man?.. I suppose he'll do. He makes a dreadful cup of canis root tea, though. But, I should be grateful. Have some septims for your efforts." He said, moving to his coffer to dig up a couple hundred septims. "Oh, and you may use my staff enchanter if you want." He added.

Was that surprise on her face? He was never very good at reading others.. Telvanni wizards don't need to be well-versed in social pleasantries, after all. That was for the lowly and weak, compensating their lack of intellect with social graces.

A couple days later, he was examining a heart stone, when it seemed she just appeared out of thin air! His patience was running thin, as of late, with all these fetching ash spawn attacks and failed heart stone experiments! He couldn't be bothered to deal with others, right now. They wouldn't appreciate his hard work anyhow. Although, the dragonborn seemed to be interested in some of the things he did, not that he blamed her. He was a master, after all.

The light of the heart stone dimmed after a moment of his experimenting, and he nearly exploded in frustration. Why couldn't these blasted things just submit to his will?

"Damn fetcher!" He cursed.

"Is there a problem, Neloth?" She waltzed up and asked.

"Hmm.. maybe _you_ could help, hero. I've been having difficulties with my heart stone experiments." Came his reply. "Have you heard of the Briarhearts?"

"What about them?"

"They are fierce warriors of the Forsworn tribes. They actually remove their own hearts and replace them with large briar seeds. It puts their lifesparks in direct connection with the natural forces. I need you to examine one of them. Just investigate as much as you can." He told her. "I'm going to put this memory spell on you, so you won't have to worry about taking notes. I doubt you could know about what was important anyway."

"Alright. Travel back to Skyrim and hunt down a Briarheart? Already done, Neloth!" She saluted and floated back down to the ground below.

In the meantime, Drovas' tea was _not_ improving. More ash spawn attacks, ash in his food, and Talvas' humming. Was Tel Mithryn cursed? Had Hermaeus Mora finally decided that he possessed more talent _and_ knowledge than him? Why was this happening to him? He had been doing everything right..

A month passed before the hero finally returned to Tel Mithryn, looking rather worse for wear. It was as if she had rolled in ash, ate some moon sugar, and polished off Molag Bal's mace with her hair! It was all tangled and wild, like she'd actually ran from Raven Rock to here, huffing all the way.

"How ya doin', Neloth?" She asked, as if nothing was going wrong. Everything was going wrong! How dare she be cheerful!

"Everything that could be going wrong, is going wrong. Ash spawn attacks, spoiled food, lukewarm tea, Talvas humming in my ear. It is as if Tel Mithryn is cursed!" He exclaimed.

"Well, on that note.. I examined a Briarheart warrior for you! Maybe that will brighten your day, hm?"

"Let me just extract those memories and I'll see if you found anything useful." He huffed. "I promise that any unrelated memories I come across will be kept in the strictest confidence. You deserve a reward for your efforts, that must've been a long trip for you."

"Talvas!" He called. His apprentice nervously rounded a corner, looking afraid. He should be.

"Yes, Master Neloth?"

"Retrieve 400 septims out of the coffers and give them to this hero here. She's been quite useful, you could learn a thing or two." He said smugly.

"Thank you, Neloth." The Bosmer said.

"There are too many coincidences.. There must be someone behind all of my recent troubles..." He spoke, mostly to himself.


	6. Chapter 6

"Is there someone attacking you, Neloth?" Illien asked the irate Dunmer.

"Yes, I have enemies. Legions of them back in Morrowind. However, in this case I have reason to believe it is someone in Solstheim." He finished, a suspicious edge in his voice, something she learned wasn't quite new for the perpetually annoyed wizard. Without a suspicious mind, how could anyone hope to achieve greatness like Neloth had?

"I suppose you want me to take care of them then?" She teased suggestively.

He huffed but spoke up, "Not yet. That may come later, but first I need to identify the culprit.. I've a ring for this purpose should a _heroic_ individual like yourself express interest in such a quest." He said, sarcasm oozing from his voice. "Here, take it."

What a fascinating enchanted object! Wow, Neloth was such a talented master of enchanting. The sorcerers back at the college should start taking notes from him. She'd never seen such a personal and _particular_ enchantment in all her years as a mage, but then she was never a mistress of enchanting.

"Brilliant! How does it work?" She asked.

"Just wear it. It will light up the source when you get close to it. I enchanted the ring with a bit of ash from the last ash spawn attack. It can follow the magical link back to its summoner." She frowned slightly when she realized he probably wasn't going to reveal his arcane secrets, but slid it on her finger nonetheless.

"Amazing! I'll be right back then, Mr. Neloth!" She called, skipping towards the blue current which would float her down.

"Don't lose that ring with your antics! It was difficult to make." She heard as she floated down.

Maybe some would be offended by Neloth's aloofness and lack of social graces, but she thought he must be such a softie somewhere, deep down. If she continued doing jobs for him, maybe she could get closer to him and break down that cold exterior and find the warmth buried deep within. An idea came to her then. What if after she helped him with his ash spawn problem, she could convince him to go to the Retching Netch with her? Brilliant!

So Illien planned her scheme down to the last detail when she stumbled upon the sarcophagi a ways away from Tel Mithryn. One of the sarcophagi was glowing, whatever was inside must be the source of the attacks. Reluctantly, she lifted up the top of the coffin, but there was only a heart stone. In the coffin was etched "Illdari Sarothril".

Two ash spawns later, she was eagerly returning to Tel Mithryn's main tower, heart stone in hand. She wondered who Illdari was, but it was probably just another person who disliked Neloth for the wrong reasons.

"I'm back!" She announced, waltzing up to the wizard who was currently hunched over a table.

"And? What did you find?" Came his annoyed voice.

"I found this heart stone glowing. It's the source of the attacks." She told him, placing both the ring and the heart stone in front of the mage.

"Hmm. I've known for decades that heart stones will animate the ash. But it would have to be very close by. Where exactly did you find this heart stone?"

"It was in Illdari Sarothril's grave." She answered.

"Ildari? Then it's my own fault. She was my apprentice before Talvas. She volunteered for one of my experiments involving heart stones. It was quite annoying when she died." Illien wasn't surprised that Neloth callously experimented on people, so she didn't press.

"There wasn't a body in the grave, though. Just a heart stone."

"What?! That's impossible. Wait... unless she didn't actually die! The heart stone could have kept her right at the edge of life and death. Could it be? Could Ildari still be alive? Could she be my nemesis? Wait a moment while I cast a more specific divination."

Curious, she watched him walk past her and into the center of the tower near the aural transportation device. Maybe it doubled as a source from which Neloth could draw his power? Fascinating..

"I call upon the powers of the sun, moons and stars. Ildari Sarothril, reveal yourself!" Neloth chanted, lids closed and crimson sparks falling from his outstretched fingertips. After a couple of minutes, the Telvanni wizard turned to her, trance now broken. "So, Illdari lives after all. She thought she could hide from me, but she can't! She's holed up in Highpoint Tower. Go rip that thrice-cursed heart stone from her chest."

"What do I get out of it?" Illien cheekily asked, having an idea for the kind of payment she wanted.

"Why is it always about money? Yes, yes. I'll find something around here to pay you with." Neloth dismissed.

"I don't want money, Neloth!" She exclaimed.

"Then what do you want?" He asked, suspicion returning to his voice.

"When I return, I'll tell you! It's nothing expensive, nothing _material_." Neloth's eyes squinted a bit at her sudden scheming, his logical mind no doubt trying to find out what it was she wanted. But he could wait!

"Fine, fine. Go then." The wizard waved his ashen hand and she took her cue to leave.


	7. Chapter 7

What could the Dragonborn possibly want that wasn't money or something worth material wealth? The adventurous kind were only after gold or glory, in Neloth's experience, if the Nerevarine was any indication of that. He had planned on making her a member of House Telvanni, a great honor, especially for anyone who wasn't Dunmer. What else could she possibly want?! He was distracted now, considering all the possibilities of what she would ask for. He deemed her worthy of being a member of his house, for she was talented with conjuration, after all, and she'd been quite useful thus far.

Annoying _and_ confusing! This is why he rarely left his tower, people were so simple and simple things eluded him, too lowly for him to try to understand. Yes, that must be why he couldn't understand the dragonborn. What was her name even? He didn't place too much significance in names, but he needed to know if he was going to allow her to be in his house, so that he could update the current roster he had. He was completely out of the loop with the rest of his house back in Vvardenfell. Worthless fools anyhow, he was the greatest of them and they had never recognized it.

"Talvas!" He called from the table he was currently sitting at.

"Y-yes, Master Neloth?" Was that a stutter? How pathetic. But at least he recognized how great his master was.

"What is the dragonborn's name?" Obviously, Talvas wasn't expecting that. Another point for Neloth.

"H-her name is Illien, Master. Bosmeri name."

"I _know_ it is a bosmeri name, Talvas! She is obviously a bosmer. You don't need to fill my ears with useless information. I only asked you what her name was." Idiot!

"Yes, Master Neloth. As you say.."

"Idiot boy!" Neloth muttered to himself as he watched Talvas sulk away.

So, her name was Illien. How _very_ Bosmer. At least she was a mer, though, it wouldn't look too good to have someone of the lesser races added to House Telvanni's roster, not that he really cared too much about the impressions he left on others.

"Neloth! I'm back!" The elf in question sounded from across the room, startling him from his thoughts. It was as though she materialized out of thin air! Fetcher! Useful fetcher though, and so much more exciting than dull Talvas.

"By Malacath's hairy toenails, girl! Do you have a death wish?" He scowled.

"Nope! But.. Illdari is dead, one nemesis down."

Neloth had to admit, he was quite impressed, and he had _very_ high standards, for others, at least. The bosmer beamed up at him, and for some odd reason or other, he couldn't bring himself to be annoyed by her usual antics. Sure, she was annoying just like everyone else, but she was becoming quite valuable, much more so than Talvas. He almost snorted aloud when comparing Talvas' usefulness to Illien's.

"Well, well. You have proven to be a more valuable ally than I anticipated. I would like to make you a member of my household. A member of House Telvanni. No need to thank me. I know you are overwhelmed with gratitude."

"Does your offer still stand about rewarding me through other means?" She asked him. On instinct, his eyes shifted into slits, as his previous thoughts had been about guessing what she wanted. If it was lessons she wanted, he supposed he could oblige. If she wanted to learn, he supposed it needed to be done right.

"What? I never _agreed_ to reward you anyway else. But, I suppose I will consider what you want. It depends on the manner of your request."

"Alright, don't judge me too hard." She said, a tantalizing grin coming to her face. Suspicion and anticipation danced in the recesses of his mind.

"I'm waiting." He didn't have all day! He had matters to attend to.

"Willyougototheretchingnetchwithme?" What?

"Come again?" He asked, annoyance now joining the suspicion and anticipation.

"Will you meet me at the Retching Netch tonight for a drink?"

Absurd! He had no time for such frivolity. He had important matters to work on here in Tel Mithryn. But.. he hadn't been asked to go for a drink with anyone in nearly a millennia. Being a member of House Telvanni and working on significant arcane projects meant there was no time for foolishness. Perhaps, though, a couple hours in Raven Rock wouldn't be too much to ask for from him. If it set him back in the least on his research, he could think of some way for her to pay him back. She was now a member of House Telvanni, after all - and he was her superior!

Her golden eyes were larger now, akin to a guar pup begging for its next meal. Wait, why would she want him to meet her at the Retching Netch? Now that was a mystery he was going to solve. If he was reluctant before, now he was.. curious.

He sighed, relenting to the request. "Fine. This is very foolish though. And don't get it in your small mind that this will be a regular occurrence. I'll be there as soon as the sun sets. Do not keep me waiting, for I have more important things I could be doing."

She squealed and looked.. happy? Why would she be happy? They were only seeing each other in a dingy pub in Raven Rock, unless.. she had something interesting planned?


	8. Chapter 8

Illien had it all planned out. She had dressed in the finest fabrics from her homeland of Valenwood, a short, mossy green dress in the style her tribe had worn. It was unlikely Neloth would notice though, he seemed so impervious to her fondness for him!

"This is a bad idea, sera. You are aware he is completely mad and likely will not notice, nor care, about your attempts at wooing him, right?" Teldryn said from the table next to her.

"You don't know that! Besides, I doubt he has any real friends that care about him." She defended.

"With that dress on, I doubt friendship is the only thing on your mind, sera."

"I don't pay you for snarky comments, Teldryn!"

"You haven't even paid me in two months! Time to pay up, now that you mention it. Especially now that I'm going to have to experience this awkward exchange between you and _Neloth_ , of all people." Teldryn was being unnecessarily rude, but she could let it pass, just this once, or maybe more. Probably more. Besides Neloth, he was her favorite Dunmer.

"Fine. I'll pay you tomorrow. And when Neloth comes in, I want you to move to the other side of the room so you don't ruin everything with your mean comments!" She could practically _feel_ , if not see, Teldryn rolling his eyes behind his chitinous mask.

"As you say, sera."

When he got up, she could feel nervousness coursing through her being. Neloth was finally here, and seemingly on time, too! She smoothed down the brown expanse of hair, pulling out any imaginary tangles, and looked at the Telvanni wizard making his way irritatingly down the stairs. How out of place he looked here! She watched Geldis' red eyes widen at the sight of Telvanni robes, and widen even more as Neloth sat opposite of her.

Even if someone told her Alduin had returned from the lost currents of time, it still couldn't wipe the stupid smile that now plastered her face at the sight of the prestigious and disgruntled Telvanni wizard sitting next to her in the _Retching Netch_ , of all places.

"Geldis! A couple sujammas, if you would." She knew Geldis could hear her, as he'd yet to take his eyes off of their table yet. She could see from her peripheral.

A few seconds later, he set down two flasks of sujamma in front of them, and she laid a few septims in his ashen hand. She directed her smile at the surprised dunmer barkeep, and thanked him sweetly. Geldis had been a good friend of hers, but he could be damn nosy!

"So, Neloth.. how has your evening been thus far?" She asked him, amused that he was running diagnostic spells on the flasks of sujamma, likely looking for poison.

"Hmm.. our drinks appear to be untainted. It should be safe for consumption." He said, likely thinking out loud.

"How often do you come here? Geldis would never taint the drinks, he's too desperate for custom."

"I heard that!" Geldis said from behind his bar.

She giggled at the barkeep's voice, but her eyes were still glued to Neloth's. His eyes were a lighter red than most dunmer she'd met, possibly arcane influence?

"I confess I have never come here. Tel Mithryn is safe and that is where my work often keeps me. I don't usually have time for.. these things." Was it her or were the tips of his ears turning a bit purple?

"Then we must do this more often!" She stood up, and Neloth's eyes suspicious followed her, "I propose a toast! To Neloth, Master Wizard of the Great House of Telvanni! May he live long and happy, and ever prosper!" She lifted her cup in the air, which was only followed awkwardly by Teldryn on the other side of the inn.

Neloth was still staring at her as he took tiny sips from his sujamma flask. He looked.. confused? Flustered, even? How long had it been since someone had shown him true kindness?

"It is lovely to be here with a friend, Neloth. Thank you for coming." She said, unsure if it was the drink or the adorable wizard before her causing a blush on her olive skin.

"Friend?" Instead of his usual perpetually annoyed tone, he sounded more confused than ever.

"Yes, that is what we are - friends. I hope you feel the same."

"I.."

Feeling particularly bold, Illien scooted her chair nearer to his and wrapped her arms around the older elf, pecking him on the cheek. She kept her arms around him though, and from the corner of her eye, she could see both Teldryn _and_ Geldis gawking. Neloth had tensed up, and as if no one was around, he traced the tips of his gray fingers over the spot her lips had just been.

His high cheekbones had turned an adorable shade of purple, matching the violet color his ears had been. Those rubies of eyes lit up with curiosity and shock as he turned to face her, but he didn't look her in the eye. Was he embarrassed, or perhaps intimidated? Adorable! The big, bad Telvanni wizard did have a heart, after all.


	9. Chapter 9

Hmm, now this was rather odd. He had no weakness for physical intimacy, he had believed he'd shed that long ago. But, he _was_ perplexed. And as a researcher and lover of problem solving, he almost wished she'd do it again, if only for experimental purposes. Yes.. experimental purposes.

She walked beside him, following him back to Tel Mithryn, her hand dangling _dangerously_ close to his. What an odd bosmer, and a dragonborn, no less. A very fascinating individual, she would make for an even more fascinating test subject, but since she'd proven she was useful beyond his arcane study, what did he do with her now? Possibly, she could replace Talvas as his apprentice, but the contract between a master and his apprentice was sealed and could not be broken unless by death. A familiar crease happened upon his brow then. If she couldn't be his apprentice, then what kind of excuse could he use to keep her in Tel Mithryn?

"How old are you, Neloth?" She asked, seemingly from nowhere.

How old was he? Sometimes, he forgot. It became unimportant and unceremonious by the time one reached one thousand. Great mages always lived long, it wasn't surprising, nor was it something of interest to him.

"I will be celebrating my 1,081st birthday in a month from now. I fail to see how that is important!"

"Wow! 1,081? That is so rare among my people, mostly because we're not often studied in the arcane. As for me, I'll be celebrating my 78th birthday in a month too, I wonder if we have the same birthday!"

What does it matter? Neloth had become uninterested in the aging process years ago, for elves like them, it was completely irrelevant.

"Illien, why did you do what you did back there?" He asked, curiosity now having the main foothold. Usually, it shared a space next to annoyance and they fought a long, laborious fight.

"What? You mean kiss you, then hug you? Why do you think? I _like_ you, Neloth! I appreciate how brilliant you are, and how uptight you are too. Underneath all that sulk and irritation, you _are_ nice! Others just don't see it." She answered then shrugged.

Many had called him brilliant, a master of the arcane, but no one had _ever_ called him nice. He was _not_ nice!

"At least someone appreciates my brilliance, even if it is just _you_." He had intended for it to sound snarky, but his voice was lacking in its usual displeased undertone for some reason, why was that?

Of course, instead of taking offense to it as he had intended for her to do, she did the exact opposite and giggled. She frolicked ahead of him, looking the part of the stereotypical bosmer gallivanting in the woodlands as if there were nothing wrong in the world - no problems to solve. Bosmer were rare in this side of Tamriel, and unlike the eloquence and poise the other mer had (including the Dunmer and the Altmer), the Bosmer were the premier frolickers of Tamriel, seeming to have no care for the grace and customs of their other kin.

It mattered not to Neloth, he cared little for customs which only seemed to compensate for an individual's lack of actual talent.

And maybe.. just maybe, he did like it when she kissed him on the cheek. But of course, it was only for experimental purposes.

"Do it again." He commanded.

"What?" She asked innocently. He hated it when people acted coy, but he'd let it go just this once since she'd proved most useful to his efforts.

"Do I _really_ have to say?" Infuriating bosmer!

"Ohhhh! You want me to kiss you again!"

He huffed, his face feeling warmer by the second. Why was that?

She paused in her skipping, and traipsed back over to him, her large, golden eyes looking up to meet his. Her slender fingers unlaced his crossed arms, which had always seemed to permanently stick there. Once she had achieved her grand purpose, she leapt in and placed a chaste kiss to his face, this time on his lips. How odd of a sensation!

She had repeated the same action at least five times by the time they finally arrived at Tel Mithryn, and instead of it being annoying, it was actually rather welcomed!


	10. Chapter 10

10 Years Later...

It had been a shock to all when Neloth, Master Wizard of the Great House of Telvanni, had arrived to Vvardenfell, with a wife. A bosmer wife, no less! As always, he remained impervious to their criticisms, having no social aptitude and no care for it either. His wife, on the other hand, was quickly becoming the social butterfly of Tel Naga, and the focal point of gossip.

People often asked what kind of spell Neloth cast on her to force such a kind individual like herself to marry such a cruel elf. Illien knew Neloth was unpopular among his contemporaries, but it seemed that with every passing day, she only seemed to love him even more. Sure, he wasn't a conventional husband, favoring crafting spells for her over picking flowers. But just the other day, he had taken some time out of his rigorous research to craft a spell which could summon daffodils on the ground in front of her, the kind of daffodils only found in her homeland of Valenwood.

And a year after she and Neloth arrived back in his home of Tel Naga, she had fallen pregnant, which was a very big deal for the mer who were much less fertile than their human or bestial counterparts. Neloth outwardly was not excited, rather he seemed much more on edge than usual. The women she'd grown close to voiced their doubts over whether the father of her child could fulfill the role he was meant to. Some of them even offered to take care of her child, but she waved all of them off. Neloth was aloof and self-absorbed, but he had a sweet side she was sure he saved only for her. He had proven himself to be a true sweetheart underneath the pompous Telvanni exterior.

"Neloth!" She beamed as she found him in his study one day.

"What is it, Illien?" He asked, irritated not with her but his current obsession - finding black books in Vvardenfell.

"Don't you know, you sweet, scatterbrained wizard?" She joked. Neloth's sense of understanding social cues had not improved over the years, not that she expected them to. A Telvanni noble had no need for social niceties when they had literal slaves, after all.

"No.. no.. what is it?" He sounded curious now, and she knew she'd hooked him in. Making him think she was in on a secret he wasn't was always the way to get his utmost attention, for he must've been the most curious person she'd ever known.

"You know..." She teased, trailing off. "We met eleven years ago, Neloth, don't you know? I came to you at the Earth Stone exactly eleven years ago where we observed the people of Raven Rock being made to build for Miraak. It's basically our eleventh anniversary!" He rolled his eyes, but his soul wasn't really in it. His eye rolls had become more and more good-natured over the years.

"I'm guessing you want me to do something sentimental for this rather ordinary day? What is it you want, Illien...?" He asked, his voice filled with hesitation and reluctance. Her poor, sweet, eccentric husband still had trouble expressing his feelings, even over ten years later.

"Weeeeeell, last year, you took me to a dwemer ruin where they manufactured only spiders. But in my current state, maybe you can teach me how to grow the spores you used to grow the towers of Tel Mithryn? You told me you would teach me some mycology!"

"That was before I learned about the black books hidden here in Vvardenfell. And now, because I can't let you read the black books in your current state, I have to find someone else who is willing or foolish enough to actually open them. There aren't many people who have read five black books and escaped with their sanity like you had. So it is a lot of work trying to find someone willing to do this." He grumbled, but finally made eye contact, relenting, "But.. I suppose I have some time to teach you about the spores of Tel Mithryn. Of course, you know this is to be held in the highest confidence. We wouldn't want anyone else mimicking us, especially the fools here."

"Of course, my love." She said, leaning into him. He had become much, much more receptive to physical contact over the years, but it had been challenging to teach him in the beginning.

"You are, for all intents and purposes, my successor, so I suppose it is practical that you know it anyhow." He replied, his voice light, a tone she'd only heard him use when they were in private.

"Yay! You are still the loveliest elf I know, Neloth. Never change for anyone!"

He huffed, his feathers all but ruffled, but returned her touch soon enough.


End file.
